#NaNoWriMo: Off to a Rocky Start

 
Writing 50,000 words in 30 days. I don’t know if I just enjoy mentally and emotionally abusing myself (although the evidence over the last 4 years suggests this to be true), but I told myself I would participate in attempting to write a shit ton this month. And on day one, I am failing miserably.
 
I woke up this morning after a rough night. Not because I participated in any Halloween night debauchery. That would require me to be social and have a life. Which I don’t. No, I had a much less interesting reason for not operating at 100% today: the sudden development of a cold. Poorly timed ailments are a common occurrence in my life, unfortunately. On top of being sick, I spent my morning doing laundry and shampooing the section of the carpet in the dining room that my dog considers his own personal toilet, no matter how many times I take the little fucker outside. By noon, I had pretty much given up on writing today.
 
I flopped down on my bed, ready to take a nap, when I took note of my desk. My white, sleek $150.00 piece of Scandinavian design courtesy of IKEA. It sat in the corner of my bedroom, the office area that I spent a week meticulously designing to be my ultimate zen work space. My creative retreat. Currently, that retreat was overflowing with clothes, magazines, and mysteriously, no desk chair. A clear visual display that the area was not being utilized properly. And probably hadn’t been for a while.
 
At that moment, something clicked. Life getting in the way wasn’t a new thing. I have a clear pattern in how I deal with life and writing. And I needed to break it. Within twenty minutes, my clothes were cleared off and folded away, and my laptop was open.
 
I didn’t officially sign up for National Novel Writing Month online. I didn’t think it necessary. I treat it simply as a personal goal to develop a writing schedule. If a novel comes out of it, great. If a couple short stories come out of it, awesome. Simply writing, and letting the work become what it is meant to be, is an accomplishment.
 
Today was a bad day. But at the end of the day, I still managed to write something. For me, that is a win. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a win, too.
 
 

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